My Best Friend

We met in 5th grade and I knew then that this young man would be pivotal in my life even at the tender age of 10.  There was something about him that gave me the knowing that there he’d be on the worst day of my life some 8 years later when my beloved sister passed from this earthly domain. I recall him meeting me at the end of the driveway ready to console me and he did so by his mere presence. He had the courage to appear when most of my acquaintances became shrinking violets.   Many meant well but when people don’t know what to say they stay away when in truth there were no words anyone could say. He became my best friend that day even though I knew it long before. 

He was instrumental in elevating my courage when I donned skis for the first time and his fearlessness was my example to venture when my heart was timid. He loved the Beach Boys and 50 years later those songs still resonate with me as but one of his gifts he bestowed on me.  We experienced many of the rights of passage of youth and it was he who was responsible to guide me into the college that would alter my course irrevocably. 

Magically he arrives again after a long hiatus and I know that because I am playing a different instrument he hears the music. I wasn’t ready for him for so many years but now I think I just might be.  My best friend Bobby is again standing at the end of my driveway.  There are no coincidences none.  

The Breakfast Club 2nd Edition

I for one am grateful that TBC was formed by the HBIC, Nancy Kaplan. For the most part our acquaintance/friendships were relegated to banter before and after class but now we have a genuine forum where we can discuss (in an elegant way of course) any number of topics from the class itself, the latest hot topic (not gossip) as well the meal du jour.   Some members of our semi-exclusive club bring their own healthy additives to enhance just about any concoction those delightful people at the Health Bar build for us. Lisa for instance has a powdered peanut butter, which she adds to her liquid nutriceutical, and my guess is that it is stripped of the fattening oils. I hope for Lisa’s sake that it has some taste unlike most of the low-fat and gluten free offerings of today that are long on missing ingredients and short on taste. Which brings to mind what Kristen has always said that nutrition is King and exercise is Queen.  Her words ring in my shell like ear: “You can’t work off a bad diet”. 

As self-appointed recording secretary I want to say that if TBC is to endure I will need some running commentary from you lest it seem like a personal diatribe, which I want to avoid. So please make your voice heard. If you want to remain anonymous I will certainly respect your wishes but let’s hear from you especially if you’re reading this. I expect to hear from Nancy, Cindy and David don’t tell me you’re shy I need to hear from you as well. I am sure we can count on Dana and if we coax the Queen maybe she will honor us with a royal visit one day. That might be difficult with her life schematic. 

June and summer are fast approaching with that the new group exercise schedule is out and the scuttlebutt is from Mount Olympus that all  spin classes will be trimmed to 45 minutes. What do you think about that? I like it because if you can wrap your brain around the idea that we only have 45 minutes I contend that you will actually work harder and correct me if I’m wrong KJ or Dana (if you’re listening) we may burn just as many calories as the traditional length classes we became so accustomed to.  And by all means mix it up a bit add some upper body strength workouts to round out our regimens thereby avoiding overuse injury and ennui.  Look who’s talking?  

Has anyone had the notion that our sessions have gotten even more intense? Is it just my imagination? What say you? I am hoping we can entice Dana to weigh in on how well we are doing and maybe a hint or two on how to make each session even more efficient. The best one I have heard of late was from KJ when she told us to sit on our pelvic bone rather than our pubic bone. It eliminates that numbness in the groin some of us men suffer.

 See you soon at The Breakfast Club. Charter memberships are being offered for an extended period of time. Please see the HBIC. (Head Bitch in Charge)  

P.S.

If you have any difficulty posting a comment send them along to me at Jackbriant@mac.com

The Breakfast Club

It’s not 1985 but the present day and The Breakfast Club meets on Saturday after spin at the Health Bar at our EQ. I met with the 3 charter members yesterday: David, Cindy and the HBIC, Nancy.  Of course the fare is haute cuisine from our friends behind the counter  but it’s all about the conversation, which was spirited. These three hold court as other members and even instructors and their spouses like Dana and Chad happen by for a chat about the class and the world news within the confines of our beloved gym.  

 David, Cindy and Nancy. They are warm, friendly, don’t take themselves too seriously but are serious about fitness and what they take in their bodies. Healthier lifestyles are their foundation. So very 21st Century. Nancy and Cindy I know pretty well for the last 3+ years we’ve always had playful banter and you can tell its more than just jocular as both women show me genuine concern and I value their counsel very much. 

 David I thought was enigmatic when I first met him in spin. He seemed aloof almost but that was pure imagination on my part as David is a well-loved member and never has anything but positive thoughts and words for everyone who knows him at EQ. 

Without spin there might not be a Breakfast Club because there’s where the seeds of friendship were sown. When you band people together united toward one goal they are drawn to each other and their true personalities are open and on display. Because we love our spin classes with the likes of Kristen and Dana it’s natural that when we sit together and break bread (gluten free of course) inhibitions are left behind.  We feel more vulnerable but safe as well.  

Part II Tomorrow. 

Habits vs Intention

Are your habits stronger than your intention? An interesting collection of words to be sure and they conjure up a host of cognitions. We intend to do the right thing but our habits say just the opposite. We want to be magnanimous but our actions speak only of being miserly. The element of fear is the pebble in the shoe that keeps us from realizing that there is no limit on abundance in fact the more we give the more we receive in return. Not easy grasping on to that notion. We learn from our upbringing that it’s dog eat dog and the only way to get ahead is to go out and take what is rightfully ours and as long as we don’t break any laws its our God given right to garner as much as we can lest the other guy get it first. 

We intend to stay sober but our habitual drinking says it’s our right to take our comfort as a reward for the life we struggle with. We would love to exercise and be fit because we know a healthier body is pleasing to look at and functions as it was intended before our habits destroyed what we were given. We don’t want to smoke but the habit is so strong the intention to quit lies just out of reach like the veritable carrot on a stick. 

Are our habits stronger than our intention? Unfortunately habits are easy to get into and not out of. Intention however if given enough time at the podium is more than just a speech it’s the new way of life.   

Just My Opinion

If more people would spend time in the opposite view point taking the other side in an argument they are fully associated with the world might just be a different place. It’s not easy taking the opposing view especially in politics because heaven forbid that the politico on the other side of the aisle just might have strength in their opinion. As Americans we are too perfunctory and dismissive to even entertain the idea that a liberal or a conservative might have something of value to say. 

When I was a boy liberal meant that you were open to contrarian ways of thinking and you were committed to listening rather than judging. As a middle of the roader I feel liberals have become just the opposite of their predecessors and are quick to judge and worse yet ridicule anyone that doesn’t see their point of view. 

Conservatives for their part are too busy railing against the other side as to what they aren’t doing instead of what is being done right. Some conservatives might even exclaim that liberals have everything wrong. 

Truth is no view point possesses all the answers and if only Republicans were required to argue for the exact opposite of what they believe they just might hear what they had been closed off to. And the Democrats   ought to think about harkening back to leaders like JFK and reconnect with what the word liberal truly means. 

When Love Takes Over Part II

The way to a woman’s heart is paved with emotion and a nice physique and good brain help but her mind and body open when a man tries to empathize with his woman rather than trying to understand her. 

Love becomes a sticking point in a man-woman relationship however when the female of the species insists on the premise that “He should just know”.  From a man’s perspective trying to read a woman’s mind is like trying to solve the Rubik’s cube blindfolded. In a movie White Men Can’t Jump (1992) Rosie Perez’s character tells Woody Harrelson that she is thirsty. He like a good BF hands her a glass of water. She says NO that’s not what she wants him to do. What she does want is for him to acknowledge her thirst rather than quench it.  

Men are from Mars and Women from Venus is not just a marketing phrase because how they each perceive communication albeit in the same solar system are still different planets. If a man can become Kreskin and read minds his love will be blissful throughout but since most mortals are not so blessed he will probably be stuck with the plague of asking his lover to confide in him what exactly it is she wants. The solutions that come quick to the mind of man are the one’s to avoid.  

More on this subject….

When Loves Takes Over

You may be in your right mind but then again you might not. Giving up the wheel when you’re used to doing the driving is not an easy thing. Having to trust province to guide you from making illegal turns and navigating instincts in collision is not for the faint of heart.  

How do you know you’re in love though? Is it physical, emotional, spiritual or historical? My guess is that it’s a combination of all four but which one do we trust the most and which one the least?  Usually we lead with the law of attraction first because without the physical connection affairs of the heart simply don’t get off the ground. Not at first anyway. My thoughts are that the chemistry factor of love is just about the most unreliable.  Don’t get me wrong everyone needs the human touch that excites our nerve endings but the truth of the matter is that we can be attracted to so many people but that doesn’t mean a relationship is possible or even desirable. And I am sure there are many stories in the naked city that didn’t start off physical and ended up smoking hot later on down the line.  

Friends first is probably the safest route to a lasting love but when a man hears a woman wants friendship it usually means in his mind that he is the designated utility outfielder unlikely to see much action. I think though that’s where most men go wrong and if they could just be persistent and consistent the more likely that strategy will pay off if he is truly not just out to bed her.  For the woman wants passion but if a man leads with understanding and avoids trying to fix things and just listens four times more than he speaks he’s more likely to build a foundation that won’t topple once the rains come.  

More on this subject soon as the spirit moves me.  When loves takes over.