Man Up

If I hear this once more in the 21st Century I will have reverse peristalsis. Cease and desist with this 20th Century phrase. Stop telling the male gender to Man Up!  Don’t you just hate it guys when 53% of the world is trying to tell the other 47% they have to grow a pair? 

If you want us to be men stop trying to pretend you have a different configuration than God conceived you with. I am sick of the male being emasculated and then being told how to be a man. God does it piss me off.  Oh and this thing about dragging your maiden name with you when you get married? It’s your fathers name remember!  

If you could scratch them you would too!  

Jenny Little

 

 

I thought I might title this entry: Attack of the 50 Foot Woman but thought better of it so as not to scare anyone away. That title was actually a sci-fi  movie of the same name dated 1958 with probably the worst special effects captured on celluloid film. The heroine grown to mythic proportions is transparent throughout because CGI hadn’t been invented just yet.

Jenny on the other hand has quite genuine “special effects” resplendent with the talent of some of the best spin instructors I’ve experienced at my former home at Equinox in New York. Ms. Little displays the science of Dana Mancini who was remarkable for making class an “inside job” and the athleticism of Rocky who took my physiology “once step beyond” what I thought I was capable of and of course the Queen of spin Kristen James whose charm and charisma sparked my “afflatus” in many of my writings here on the net.

Jenny today this Sunday reignited my blue flame which I have to say I thought had just run out of propane. Five and a half years of spinning yarns literally about spin class had me thinking that this series was just done. What else could I say? Well maybe a new chapter new geography a new face might just put a new spin on my flywheel. I could complain that the Spinner bikes at 24 Hour Fitness are a bit long in the tooth with no onboard computer or creature comforts I had grown accustomed to back in Woodbury but Jenny Little made me forget that at rides end my butt hurt like the Dickens as her repertoire was positively ingenious for its complexity but simplicity in her delivery. Tempo, a driving rhythm, short breaks and a discogrpahy that was silky. Off the bike and on the bike Jenny moves with a fluidity of a Gene Kelly and the strength of a decathalete she is.

 

I will be back Jenny and thanks for bringing me back to something I really love.

 

The Best Things In Life Are Free

How is it that surrounded  in the force fed air of the  material world do we forget that the best things in life are free. It's not in  the trappings of bulging bank accounts does happiness exist. For money can bring us the rentals of luxury but when God calls us home none of those trinkets accompany us  into the ground or into the urn from the crematorium.
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The best things in life are free. The human touch, a kiss, a held hand, a glance from a loved one and a knowing smile. These gifts we share everyday and no price tag can be pulled from them.
When we cry for help and its answered I know that the best things in life are free.

The Silver Lining

I once saw a Disney movie as a kid starring Haley Mills* called Pollyanna and I know that to go through life thinking things will all turn out right might be unrealistic to some. Bad things do happen but that doesn’t mean that we should ever try to anticipate them. Life on life’s terms will always be part of the journey. And when those things like personal tragedy, death and dissolution of relationships threaten our very happiness take solace that there is always a silver lining. 

My brother in law had lost touch with his family for over a decade and as it often happens in relationships it was over something trivial which he couldn’t even recall in the present day. Life being temporary he lost his father and through that sadness he came to be with his family once again and now they talk everyday. No matter what happens the true message emerges we just have to have faith and patience that it will show up eventually. That silver lining. 

* Hayley Mills imdb.com

Intimacy

What are the qualities of intimacy we share with another human being? What comes to mind first is of course physical intimacy. It manifests itself in many forms from as trivial as casual sex to the deeper intimacies we share with those we love. The act of sex is a gift of procreation but our Higher Power saw fit to attach the pleasure principle, which drives each and every one of us to different degrees at different times in our lives. 

In order to commune with another on this level requires a mindset that encompasses all the emotions that are beyond the physical satisfaction our bodies offer to each other. After all making love is but a small part of our day it is the other 96% of our lives that improprieties in our sex life wreak havoc that can leave us with fear, frustration, anger, mistrust and misunderstanding. We need to know all the ramifications the ground rules and expectations with our partner. We cannot assume we know based on the court of public opinion. The assumption of “you should know’ doesn’t hold in the 21st Century we need to communicate with our partner about exclusivity and what constitutes fidelity and what infidelity is. The answer may seem obvious to some but not necessarily. 

I heard somewhere the expression that “a kiss is not a contract”. Too many of us assume that once we go to bed with someone we have an instant relationship. Intercourse becomes the blanket we choose to cover ourselves under that claims we now have intimacy with this person. We may have been intimate but intimacy requires a lot more effort than completing a successful sex act. More…

Say Goodbye

When we depart this world we leave behind the love we made for those that remain.  

My Catheter Ablation

The seminal moment came when I decided about 8 weeks ago to try the catheter ablation just once more. My Doctor wasn’t successful in 2003 and I never thought I would consider another attempt. Something call it a voice from beyond inexorably drew me to Saint Francis that late morning in early spring.  And when I consulted Doctor Joseph Levine again he assured me that the technology had changed so drastically in the last decade he felt without guarantees that I would be free of my A-fib. I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. I was not prepared to live the rest of my life on meds and feeling so less than my natural exuberant self. Some days I just had no get up and go. No desire no enthusiasm. A couple of years ago I would only have these “events” once a month. Lately though they were happening every day without warning. At first I thought I could ‘exercise’ through it but that was like playing with dynamite loaded dice bound to come up snake eyes. * 

For those that don’t know A-fib it’s an irregular and often rapid heartbeat that can have you living a nightmare. There would be times I’d be sitting on my couch watching a game and my normal HR of about 48 would shoot up to 138 in a blink. My neck and chest would start to throb uncontrollably and I could actually see my body vibrate.  I never got used to the fact that however remote that maybe this time the lights might go out. But my Higher Power was watching and I intuitively knew that I had more to do before God called me home. 

Medications worked for a little while I was taking beta blockers and for a time they seemed to do the trick but in the end all they wound up doing was lowering my already low heart rate at times into the 30s and left me light headed. Don’t play around with this if you have a similar condition. The statistics show that A-fib patients are 5 times more likely to have a stroke.  Those figures might end up being small but ask your family if you think you should take a chance.  Catheter ablations aren’t the panacea but besides medication and holistic alternatives the chances that you can be ‘cured’ rank up near 80%. I liked those odds. And I couldn’t help but think that my life would be shortened if I didn’t take that second shot. 

The procedure itself didn’t take long but the preparation was more arduous on the sub conscious at least that is how it was for me.  I knew that I would wake up out of my twilight when the procedure was over but whenever the heart is concerned I wasn’t going to be cavalier about it. I was well scared.  The procedure itself has the hospital staff inserting a probe a catheter into your blood vessel via the groin and it is then guided into the atrium of your heart in a non-invasive procedure.  They send radio waves that burn the inner wall and scar those where the irregular heartbeats are occurring. In my case I went into A-fib during the procedure as if God was showing Dr. Levine just where the spot was.  

I knew as I was rolling out of the procedure room that I was cured. There was just no doubt in my mind that I had made the right decision. I always say that in terms of human years at 63 ‘the stick is getting shorter’ but with the ablation behind me I just added a few inches. Now I feel like my heart is 45 again and when I climb the stairs I am winded no more.  

Today I have visions of being fitter than I’ve been in 20 years and without those confounded beta-blockers my metabolism might have gotten a shot in the arm. I am so grateful and the paradigm shift of a lifetime has just begun.  

*Snake Eyes:  A roll of two dice in which both show 1.