Good Manners

No Problem 

Well I think there is. A problem that is with the phrase all Generation X, Y and Z humans retort  when you respond with Thank You to them.  They say “No Problem”. Growing up in the 60’s Please, Thank you and Your welcome were the normal salutations when asking for something and receiving it. Somewhere in time I don’t when this annoying response to Thank You became part of our pop culture but I have detested it since I first heard it.

When I broke it down I usually heard it from people in service jobs. Restaurants, gas stations, Dunkin Donuts all the employees would say it. No Problem? Maybe they don’t mean the words as they are written because if it were a problem a lot of coffee and gas and food wouldn’t be bought in too many places. It just irked me and I know there are many more important things to talk about but No Problem is just bad manners.  

And as long as we’re at it how about waiters when they pick up the check at a restaurant? Do you need change? The gall that some of these individuals have gets me steamed. It’s preposterous. Instead of bringing back the change from the bill they want to know if they can keep the residue. I am sure this works for some getting more than they deserve because to say: Yes bring me change makes you sound like you’re penurious.  When waiters or waitresses say that to me I just say yes. It’s just bad manners. And manners are just not very fashionable in the 21st Century.  

Kristen James: A Riders Perspective

Under Construction. I want this to come out as perfect as possible. 

Jack 

My Orange Cone

I just started seeing these small orange cones dotting the floor of the Main Studio taking XCLR8 last Friday but the metaphor has a much larger connotation.  To me it meant that I have to establish boundaries in my life and when they are crossed I need to speak up and not let anyone run slipshod over me relying on my gentle nature.  

An orange cone can be moved but its me that will move it not those unauthorized who seem to make unilateral decisions that are not for them to make. Comments about me personally will always be someone else’s opinion and nothing more. It is the power that I give them that makes unacceptable behavior seem acceptable when by any account it is not.  

I will live my life and not hold court to anyone else’s opinion about what is best for me. Left to my own mind and heart I will live longer even if it is for me to be alone.  

Dyer Reborn

I was watching Wayne Dyer today on Oprah’s network in the idyllic paradise of Maui.  I have treated much of this man’s later work as simply profit motivated but at 71 and living through leukemia I saw a changed man.  His new book: Wishes is available digitally and in bookstores and in his chat with the beneficent Ms. Winfrey there was just no way Mr. Dyer could be anything but truly authentic.  She has that gift she can discern better than anyone on the planet and although I never really “got” Wayne Dyer before I finally heard him this time.  

Same Sex Marriage

Ask me at the beginning of the Millennium if I was a proponent of same-sex marriage and I would have categorically said no I’m against it. I must say at the outset I am not homophobic in fact my roommate in military college of all places was a gay man and he and I never let his sexual preference keep me from being one of my best friends. 

Let’s fast forward to the present day to the sitting President Barack Obama. He at the start of his administration was not in favor of same-sex marriage and he is a Democrat and Liberal. However in recent weeks Mr. Obama came out saying it should be legalized.  A news story on CNN asked two opposing sides if this reversal of opinion was a flip-flop or evolution. I admit I didn’t bother to listen to the two sides because by that time I had already made up my mind about same-sex marriage. 

Part II Soon 

The Last Goodbye*

Some people have a really difficult time saying they’re sorry. Not I. Being sorry is one of the first things out of my mouth when someone I know or love is not getting what they want from me.  I would hazard a guess that most of the world hates to say “I’m sorry” because either they detest the fact that they might be wrong and or being right gives them that false sense of superiority that some of us need.  

However this is about The Last Goodbye. The word “Goodbye” is the one word I am afraid of in the English language.  There are many individuals that give us tacit goodbyes when they simply stop talking to us which is in effect a last goodbye but we weren’t necessarily aware of it at the time, and there are other more strong minded individuals that tell you right to your face: Goodbye!  I admire those people because they have the guts to let go of something that just isn’t working for them and it takes courage to say goodbye. For the rest of us we hate to lose anything even if it’s something we don’t want.  

And then there are those (not me) that bluff you with ‘goodbye’.  They test your mettle to see if you can deal with them saying goodbye. These goodbyes I have never minded and often I have found they give me a feeling of instant relief. Most times though it’s like the boy that cried: Wolf and they are just pissed at you and say goodbye for effect. I usually don’t believe in these goodbyes as they are only in force for a few moments or a day or two at most.  

I think I’m afraid to say goodbye mostly because it was someone that I loved and I hate the idea that they might be sad or hurt and I feel responsible for their happiness which of course is just a lie I tell myself but I just can’t help it.  I know an alcoholic that once said that life is a series of hellos and goodbyes I guess its time for goodbye again. This alcoholic hates saying goodbye even when it’s the right thing to do.  

*Inspired by David Cook. 

I've Got a Secret*

 And someone’s leaked it.  Inevitably a secret told is instantly not one. We all love secrets and we always swear never to tell a soul however there’s always one person we tell because well what’s a secret if we can’t tell someone. And even though we thought the secret was safe with the one person we needed to divulge it to so too do they have that one person that swears on a stack of bibles that the secret is safe with them as well. And before you know it you have what was a secret now traveling around as gossip and soon you hear your own secret with just a few more details added for spice.  

*Inspired by KE$HA Kiss N Tell