My Sponsor

To those familiar with this blog know that members of AA rely on a sponsor. This is a person you choose to confide the more intimate character defects and shortcomings of your personal life in an attempt to ameliorate and when possible make amends to the people that you’ve harmed during your active life. In the first five years of my sobriety the man that was most instrumental in helping me maintain my alcohol free life since 1989 left this earth on Thursday morning May 14th. I was blessed to have chosen him and before his untimely passing we got a chance to talk at length about what we were grateful for and especially our continued long-term sobriety. 

This man brought a tough as nails attitude in his AA method but fortunately I bought into it. I didn’t always like what he had to say but instead of doing it John’s way I chose AA’s way instead. He would often say: “John take the cotton out of your ears and put it into your mouth.” These words I will never forget. Thanks Nic old friend. 

Having just a short time to reflect on my friend’s death has made me think a little bit more about my own mortality. Not in a morbid way but that AA idiom that rings true. “We only have today.” I like to think I am grounded each day but after my sponsor’s passing the gravity of his life and my own seem to carry more weight now if you can pardon the pun. Nic didn’t suit everyone’s taste but his long list of men he sponsored will be saying prayers that he entered their lives just as I will that he entered mine. 

Trying to get sober and stay sober without someone to talk to is like getting into a rowboat in a swift running stream without oars. You might get to the other embankment but why not use the tools that can help make the treacherous journey just a bit more navigable? I chose to keep my mouth shut when Nic and my program told me to and I am so glad I did because my way got me drunk and for me AA and my sponsor got me sober. And as I have said many times here if there is another protocol that works for you use it don’t go on railing against Alcoholics Anonymous. As the fictional character Charlie Chan said in a movie: “Any powder that kills fleas is a good powder.” DDGTM Nic would often say to me and for you earthlings if you think you have a problem with alcohol you probably do. 

Stay sober my friends and I know you are all over the World now please spread the word you might save someone.