Human love is often a roller coaster without a seat belt and it can buffet us about saddling us with sebaceous injuries we never heal from primarily because we never establish boundaries beyond nebulous rules that society has established and we never take the time to agree to. My step daughter comes to mind as one woman that made it very clear what she wanted in a man, what she wouldn’t tolerate and if she didn’t see every boyfriend as a potential mate she ushered him to the door right quick.
In my own life I took hostages both before I drank and when my alcoholism was active. My first wife was a serious relationship from the start and it wasn’t until later that I realized that I had tried to make her a replacement for my sister who had died suddenly at 16. It is not to say I didn’t love her because I did and she gave me the emotional support throughout that dark period in my life. I think of her as the most stable relationship I have ever had and although it did not have the fire my carnivorous appetite desired she nonetheless made me realize that human love often consumed in the carnal knowledge of another rarely lasts unless the love moves beyond the physical plane.
It is my opinion that we can never really appreciate divine or spiritual love (unless maybe you’re of the clergy) until we have really understood what human love is. It is always changing and it can vary so much we might not even recognize the shape when it started. Some are lucky enough to mate for life but in the 21st Century that has become increasingly difficult merely because technology changes people so dynamically that we often don’t even know who we are let alone who another human might be. I have heard that phrase uttered many times which often makes me cringe and it’s: I thought I knew you but now I don’t. How can anyone really know someone else? It’s impossible and because humans will definitely err measuring up to who someone thinks we are in every facet of their lives is headed for a huge disappointment.
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